11th september 2009

Today's day has been made famous in history, not by any heroic deed, but by a cowardly act that saw the death of 3000 people and millions after that in derived warfare.Well it was an epoch making event when terrorism became common man's problem. But what has that got to do with me? Why am I more interested in an event that happened thousand's of miles away? Why can't I be ignorant? "Ignorance is bliss", must have been coined for this purpose only.
In the indian history written by Bankim Chandra, he quotes an englishman who was awed to see indian farmer quitely at work while two armies were fighting a few distance away. In india that was the fact of life. No matter who became the ruler, one's existence would go on, exactly in the same way. That was how the social distinction got seeped into the collective psyche of the masses.

Well i am getting too ahead of myself. I have made a promise to myself to write a few entries every month about my life. Not that my life is extraordinary, it isn't, by any definition, but because the ease & technology is there. And the safety of numbers. With millions and millions of pages created every year mine is but an inconsequential effort, but an effort important to me at least.I expect it to stand a testimony to the fact of my existence- anywhere and everywhere at once ( for this part of me-my words stand saved on the cloud which is accessible from everywhere)

For now i do not care what i am writing. I don't intend to do so till the time my thoughts become coherent and i gain some clarity. I just plan to write- junk, gibberish or sane - i just don't care.

So was today any different than yesterday? The height of stupidity is to keep doing the same thing and expecting different outcomes, it is said. So my day was the same as the previous ones.Slept late and woke up even later. Fortunately the classes were kept at mid-day. One was on B2B selling and another on some IT topic, which I can't recall even after sitting for four lectures. How has life come to this point? Why is it so hard concentrating for 2 hrs on a trot? So sat for both the lectures like an automated robot- automated i say because no new thoughts come, no questions come... it's just the wait to see the class get over. So at the end of lecture we stand around for some time, chatting among ourselves.But the numbers have started thinning, for a class with strength of 60, maximum are absent at one point or other. It's the second year I guess, time to play senior.

So after the lectures which got over at round 9 pm, i went to matunga to catch the train to dadar. And like always, i can find the crowd on the train. So after getting down on Dadar, I am in the same automated mode when i hear shouts and swearing. On turnig back i see two people fighting. The fighting lasts barely for a minute or two, other people are at hand to separate them, but it forces me out of the deep reverie that i find myself to be in.Why do people fight, I wonder? Why can't they live happily? iS it only because of ego? Heck why the hell should I know, or I care?

But no! the questions have been framed and the pseudo intellectual in me is offering me all sorts of explanations. It is to catch him that i have decided to write. Among various ways to achieve God, Krishna says the path of knowledge is the most difficult. The problem with knowledge is that it changes with the perspective. In the dark ages, when earth was taken to be the center of universe, knowledge was something else. As it is now. It evolves. It is never still. So how can our solutions and our perspectives remain fixed? In today's world it is said change is the only constant.And why shouldn't it be? Anything that is static wears down. Look at the mighty Himalayas. Look at the roman empire. To be static is to die! So why do people feel that by the same age old definition can they survive. Each day which comes is like the countless others which have come before, but on a different plane, on a different spiral. That is why no two days are unique, like no two individuals are same. No, not even twins.

And so even in my case thought the day looks similar to the previous day, it was unique in it's own sense. So after reaching my room i fell for a quick nap. Oh about 10 min or so.But by the time i woke up (which was 20 minutes too late)the canteen had closed.So off i went to churchgate station in order to have something. God bless the IRCTC counter opposite wimpy's burger... for they are open quite late. Interestingly they have started a new dish- jumbo vada pav which comes for 10 rs. It is nothing but burger sized pav with potato stuffing in between. But it is supposed to be completely automated process in which no hands have touched the entire product. Looks good and tastes good also. So i have brought a burger and a jumbo vada pav to my room on which i am planning to feast after i finish writing these words. Time to eat I guess!

I am planning to give up playing on facebook from tomorrow. Let's see if I can keep the commitment.